Hospital happenings

Caleb is still in the hospital and could use a prayer or two! We have had quite a tender day as we try to decide how to keep him healthy and comfortable. I'm keeping his blog updated with his progress, he'd love for you to visit him since he can't have many visitors in the PICU!
Click on www.winkfromheaven.blogspot.com or you can click on his picture on my side bar....

7 boys under age 8

What do you get when you have 7 little boys under age 8 all in the same house....
a bit more messes, a bit more noise, a bit more rough housing, and a lot more FUN!
We LOVED having Dustin, Alanna and their boys stay with us for a couple of days over the holidays!

Holiday snap shots

When I got home from the hospital last night, I watched video clips that Dallan had taken with our camera of Christmas morning:
Josh and Matthew were so cute with their muffin hair as they explored their stockings and decided which gifts to open first! Matthew was first to find the telescope all set up!
Mitchell loved his new football! He walked to the middle of the room and said "THANK YOU SANTA!!!" He was a little bit scared of Santa coming to our house on Christmas Eve, but now I think he'll welcome him any time!
The boys were so excited about their presents, even though they weren't feeling very well. We even had some surprises from Santa that nobody expected!
My favorite Christmas moment at home: All of us lined up in my bed having a little snuggle before bedtime. Caleb was in our our hearts and prayers as we settled down for a long Winter's nap.
Tonight I'm staying with Caleb at the hospital...I'll keep his blog updated with his progress!

A Hospital Holiday!

We have definitely had a Christmas to remember! On Christmas Eve, we had the chance to have a yummy Christmas meal at mom's house and the boys were able to play in the snow and get pulled around by the four wheelers! We came home from grandmas, read the nativity story and had magic hot chocolate with sleeping sprinkles in it. The older boys were starting to feel sick and fevered so we tucked them in, turned on their Christmas lights and finished a Christmas story we had been reading to them.
Caleb also hadn't been feeling well the past few days and his breathing had become more rapid and shallow. He wasn't able to stay saturated with oxygen the way he should. We gave him some motrin at about 7:00 PM and for the next hour the motrin kept oozing out of his trach. He also started constantly oozing blood out of his trach. We thought he was probably aspirating so I called the on-call doctor. He asked us to take him right in the the ER at Primary Children's hospital. It wasn't what he had planned for Christmas Eve, but Dallan and I did some arranging for Santa Claus, and packed up for a holiday trip to the hospital.
Derek and Shantal wonderful to help us! Shantal stayed with our sleeping boys and Derek followed us to the hospital so that Dallan and I could be with Caleb (one to drive, the other to suction) We also planned for Derek to drive Dallan home after we got checked in so that he could be home with the boys on Christmas morning.
We made it through a snowstorm and got checked in at 11:59 PM-- still Christmas Eve!! He was hooked up to oxygen,tests were run and chest X rays were taken. It appeared that Caleb aspirated and was battling pneumonia. Dallan and Derek left at around 2:30 AM and shortly afterward,Caleb was taken to the floor. The doctors and nurses tried for hours to stabilize Caleb, but his blood pressure was dangerously low, and even at 100% oxygen, he wasn't able to stay saturated. Finally at about 7:00AM, Caleb was taken to the PICU. He continued to have blood ooze out of his trach and his color was pale and pasty. He was put on a C PAP through his trach, and that helped him stay more saturated with oxygen. The blood oozing from the trach finally finally started to lessen at about 5:00 tonight. When I left the hospital, he was much more stable. His blood pressure was within normal range and his oxygen has been weaned down to 60 %. He's still on C PAP, but hopefully he'll continue to improve.
I don't think I'll ever forget this Christmas... Caleb and I in the hospital and Dallan and the boys not feeling well at home....
But Christmas came! It came just the same! Our stockings were filled with great prizes and treats- there were presents to open stacked under the tree. There were presents from Santa that surprised us all, and even though achy, the boys had a ball! Our hearts were sure tender, but still full of love, for the gift of our Savior from Father above!

The best gift

The best gift I ever received was delivered on Christmas Eve....2 years before I was even born.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DALLAN! You are the greatest gift to me! I treasure you more than you will ever know!

I noticed

Today while my boys were eating lunch I told them "One of my favorite things about Christmas break is getting my boys home with me all day!" One of them responded back smiling, "well I think one of the worst parts of Christmas break is being home with you because you're boring and don't let us do what we want." (sniff sniff...)
I know he wasn't too serious....but this afternoon I'm wondering.....will they ever really realize all of the ways I give my heart to them? Somewhere in the mix of the "is your homework done-- did you practice the piano-- did you check on Lu Lu-- can you help the baby" will they remember the games, popcorn movie nights, story time, special treats, projects, birthday parties, classroom visits, outings, and tuck ins? Will they ever really know that my day is spent trying to make sure they have a home that is happy and loving- a place that provides them opportunities to read, create, invent, and feel peace? Usually it's Dad who takes them on weekend trips,to ball games, and other adventures while I stay home and take care of Caleb. I wonder if they'll ever really know that part of the reason those adventures are possible is because I stay home while they go. I know I'm not a perfect mom, but my heart's in it one hundred percent!
I wonder if sometimes I don't always realize how much Heavenly Father does for me. He continually surrounds me with so much evidence of his love. I don't think I thank him enough for the wonderful things that are made possible through him... today I'm noticing!
Dear Mom,
Just in case I never told you... THANK YOU! Thanks for staying home while we went hiking with Dad. Thanks for always being there. Thanks for creating a home that was full of love, happiness, creativity, warm brownies with sprinkles, and tradition. I noticed.
Love,
April

The 12th day of Christmas

(please turn off my playlist)

I am so thankful for this season and the opportunity we have to celebrate the birth of our Savior. I know that He knows me. I know that he rejoices with me in joyful times, and that he shares tears shed in tender times. He is my brother, my Savior, and friend- I love him. I hope you all have a Christmas filled with His love!

The 11th day of Christmas

(Please turn off my playlist)

The 10th day of Christmas

(please turn off my playlist at the bottom of the screen)

The 9th day of Christmas

"If you desire to find the true spirit of Christmas and partake of the sweetness of it, let me make this suggestion to you. During the hurry of the festive occasion of this Christmas season, find time to turn your heart to God. Perhaps in the quiet hours, and in a quiet place, and on your knees—alone or with loved ones—give thanks for the good things that have come to you, and ask that His Spirit might dwell in you as you earnestly strive to serve Him and keep His commandments" (Howard W. Hunter, "The Real Christmas," Ensign, Dec 2005, 22–25).

Matthew's Christmas book

Matthew brought home a Christmas book he made at school. These were my favorite pages..."What Christmas means to me is spending time with my family, having fun, giving, and celebrating!... I like to give books, games and things that people need....I like 'Up on the Housetop' and 'Jolly Old St. Nicholas.' I can play them on the piano....Dear Santa, I was very good. Please give me everything I want. me"

Merry birthday Mitchell!

My Merry Mitchell was born 2 years ago today! He was put in a stocking at the hospital, and we made it home just in time for Christmas. What a precious gift! When he was blessed Dallan said that he would be a JOY to his mother...he was right! Mitchell is so charming! He lives in the present and gets excited about everything! Mitchell knows how to make people feel extra special. He delights me with his big brown eyes and his sparkly smile! HAPPY BIRTHDAY my sweet boy! Holding baby Jesus in his hands...

Bright and early

Mitchell and his brothers enjoyed opening his birthday presents bright and early this morning!

The eighth day of Christmas

The 7th day of Christmas

"We all enjoy giving and receiving presents. But there is a difference between presents and gifts. The true gifts may be part of ourselves—giving of the riches of the heart and mind—and therefore more enduring and of far greater worth than presents bought at the store... (James E Faust)

Snowy Days

Christmas is in the air....! We had our first big snow storm yesterday! There is something magical about waking up in the morning to a blanket of fresh snow. The boys couldn't wait to go out and play in it. I think they were soaked before they even got to school! Even though Mitchell still had his pj's on, he started to bundle up so that he could play outside with his brothers!
For Family Home Evening this week we made our gingerbread house! The boys love this tradition! We're lucky that this much candy ended up on the house! YUM

The 6th day of Christmas

The 5th day of Christmas

I believe in Santa Claus...
He wears red
His hair is white
He comes in the night
He loves little children
He knows we are good
He brings gifts

from: "I Believe In Santa Claus" by Diane G Adamson

The 4th day of Christmas

...He stared down at Who-ville! The Grinch popped his eyes! Then he shook! What he saw was a shocking surprise!

Every Who down in Who-ville, the tall and the small, Was singing! Without any presents at all!

He HADN'T stopped Christmas from coming! IT CAME! Somehow or other, it came just the same!

And the Grinch, with his grinch-feet ice-cold in the snow, Stood puzzling and puzzling: "How could it be so?" "It came with out ribbons! It came without tags!" "It came without packages, boxes or bags!" And he puzzled three hours, till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before! "Maybe Christmas," he thought, "doesn't come from a store." "Maybe Christmas...perhaps...means a little bit more!"

And what happened then...? Well...in Who-ville they say That the Grinch's small heart Grew three sizes that day!

And the minute his heart didn't feel quite so tight, He whizzed with his load through the bright morning light And he brought back the toys! And the food for the feast! And he... HE HIMSELF...! The Grinch carved the roast beast!

The Merry Moodys

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

The 3rd day of Christmas

Christmas miracles

I believe in miracles. I put miracles on my lap every day. I am surrounded by miracles at my dinner table. I see miracles every time I look out my window. I feel miracles happen in my heart. I witness miracles daily in my little neighborhood. I'm reminded of the miraculous events for which we celebrate this season.
I've been blessed with Christmas miracles this week. I am tender, I am touched and I am truly thankful!

The 2nd day of Christmas

From President Thomas S Monson

* Send that note to the friend you’ve been neglecting.

* Give your child a hug.

* Give your parents a hug

* Say “I love you” more

* Always express your thanks.

* Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved.

* Let us relish life as we live it, find JOY in the journey, and share our love with friends and family.

The 1st day of Christmas

I wanted to post something meaningful for each of the 12 days of Christmas!

A gift to the Savior

"....you may well want to give a gift to the Savior. But he seems to have everything, doesn’t he? Well, not quite. He doesn’t have all of us with him again, forever—not yet. I hope we are touched enough by the feelings of his heart to sense how much he wants to know each of us is coming home to him. We can’t give that gift to him in one day or in one Christmas. But we could show him today that we are on the way."
Henry B Eyring

Elder Wirthlin Tribute video

Holiday Hugs!

Sending you some Holiday Hugs!

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

Rudolph

When I was growing up, the Christmas season didn't officially begin until we watched Rudolph the Red Nose Reigndeer! I just LOVED that movie! The other night my boys jumped into my bed and snuggled while they watched that very same flick. I'm glad that in this digital age of animation, we all still enjoy the charm of a talking snowman, a red nosed deer, and an abominable snow monster!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY Matthew

It was Matthew's birthday yesterday! He enjoyed opening his presents bright and early in the morning! He was so excited about each one! Dallan took a late lunch at home so I could leave the little boys and read some stories to his class on his special day! It was our ward party that night so we decided not to do cake yet. Instead, I made him rice crispy treats with Christmas sprinkles for an after school snack! Today he had a small party with a few friends. They decorated their own aprons with fabric paint then they all made their own pizza. The kids were great chefs! Matthew didn't want cake...yet...His favorite treat is doughnuts, so we put candles in them instead. Tomorrow we'll have cake and have a birthday dinner with family! What a lucky boy...a 3 day birthday!

All I want for Christmas

What a morning.... I decided to be ambitious and cut Caleb's hair. I didn't think about all of the hair getting stuck in the goop around his neck...Now I have visions of hair clogging up his trach tube. Mitchell found my wall flower air freshener and dumped at least half of the oil on the floor... so my house smells A LOT like Christmas. And, I was trying to fix the strap of Caleb's trach mask with a pin, I decided to bite the pin with my teeth...and the pin chipped my front tooth-right in the middle. I even cried about it a little because my other front tooth is already fake from a wave runner escapade....now my original is damaged goods! So all I want for Christmas is my front tooth fixed! At least my dentist is getting me in this afternoon!

Elder Wirthlin

My heart was really tender as I learned of the death of Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin. Today I'm remembering his most recent talk that I loved!
"Come what may and LOVE it!"

Learn to Laugh: The next time you’re tempted to groan, you might try to laugh instead. It will extend your life and make the lives of all those around you more enjoyable.

Seek the eternal: Sometimes the very moments that seem to overcome us with suffering are those that will ultimately suffer us to overcome.

The Principle of Compensation: The third thing we can do is understand the principle of compensation. The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude.

Trust in the Father and the Son: He who descended below all things will come to our aid. He will comfort and uphold us. He will strengthen us in our weakness and fortify us in our distress. He will make weak things become strong.

Mr. Potato Head

Mitchell couldn't figure out why the glasses didn't fit him the same way...

As we start the season, remember the reason

(please turn off the music on my playlist at the bottom of the page)

Changing seasons!

Everyone must take time to sit and watch the leaves turn...
-- Elizabeth Lawrence
(photograph of the Smith farm in New York, taken by Mom and Dad Moody)

"The woods are full of fairies; the sea is full of fish; the trees are full of golden leaves; let's make an autumn wish." I haven't been ready for the leaves to be gone and for the cold to settle in. Most of my leaves have fallen now and there is a hush in the air before Winter arrives. I love the magic that the holidays bring, but today I'm taking just a minute to wish the golden days of Autumn would last just a little bit longer. I want a few more days to breathe the sweet air and watch the leaves fall almost like they are in slow motion. I want to watch my boys play in their raked up piles and to see their hair sparkle in the sunshine. I want the streets to be lined with yellow leaves that swirl in a greeting when I drive through them. So I've gathered up a bit of Autumn and I've put it in my pockets.
So now I'm saying good bye to Fall as I create Christmas cards and decorate my tree! I'm preparing for a Winter indoors with Caleb recovering from surgery, and days that are too cold to go outside. My wish is that on those days when the holidays are over and I'm tired of being home bound- I'll take a pinch of Autumn out of my pocket and sprinkle it in my heart- and I know I'll warm right up.


"If I had my life to live over, I would start barefoot earlier in the spring and stay that way later in the fall."
Author: ~Nadine Stair

Christmas lists

Making a Christmas list can be quite a chore! Sometimes it's hard to know what to ask for. With 6 simple gifts carefully thought through and bought, we think this Christmas will teach us a lot!

This is how I am shopping for my older boys this year (Mitchell will be thrilled with some play dough, and Caleb will love some new v-neck shirts and a few bibs!)

Something you want
And something you need
Something to wear
And something to read
A Christmas surprise for this Holiday Season
And a meaningful gift to remind you the reason

* Most of these gifts will be really simple! We're going to have a family home evening where we talk about needs,wants, and the reason for the season. Then I'm going to show them our list to help them consider their Christmas expectations. I am hoping this list makes it seem special to receive needed things like socks or a pack of drawing paper but still leaves some room for a "want" and a little surprise. I always like to give them each a new book to read, and for a meaningful gift I think I am going to use some frames I have to frame their favorite scripture, a picture of the temple, or the monthly themes for the new year in primary. I hope you all have fun shopping and creating things for the people you love!

Thanksgiving

I'm thankful for....

Home

Caleb is home with us tonight! We spent the morning getting all of his equipment set up and his supplies organized. When everything is running, it sounds a little bit like a subway station! We picked Caleb up this afternoon and he looked so cute wearing clothes again! He always looks a little bit sicker when he's just sitting there in his diaper with wires and tubes everywhere! On the counter we found that another therapist left her name and phone number to call if we ever needed help with Caleb while we went to church. I was so touched.
Caleb did well on the car ride home and is doing well in his cozy bed. We are so happy to be all together again. One thing I am feeling tender about is his ability to be portable. Right now he really needs the humidifier and oxygen so he is quite confined to his little room. It feels like we are back to where we were when he was a new baby and didn't leave the nursery for 3 months. I know that as time goes on, we'll be able to see what Caleb is capable of, and all of his new cares will be a normal part of our routine. Life is like that. You just adapt and find joy in every day. We're all together, Caleb can breath better, and that makes me happy.

Special visitors

Caleb was moved from the ICU into his own room yesterday! Dallan spent the morning with him, then took a break to go to the BYU vs. Utah game. He met Josh and Matthew at the game then brought them back to see Caleb. Caleb was sad to hear the score- but he was so happy to see his brothers!



There are more details and pictures of Caleb's progress on his blog.

A cozy little book nook

I love children's books! They are my fetish! I'd rather buy a new book than new shoes or a fancy purse! On my nightstand you'll usually find a pile of books that I checked out of the Juvenile literature section. In my library box, you'll find lots of picture books to read aloud and an assortment of chapter books for my school age children to curl up and read. I recently created a blog where I and some fellow book lover friends can share what we're reading. We would love to hear about any juvenile books you have on your nightstand, what books the children in your life enjoy, and what books you read for fun! http://cozylittlebooknook.blogspot.com
let me know if you'd like to be a contributor!

Faith instead of fear

Caleb had so much courage today! Caleb had a difficult morning because he still wasn't feeling well. When we got to the hospital and checked him in, the doctor ordered a chest x ray because he wasn't getting enough oxygen. Sure enough, he's fighting pneumonia! They all agreed that going forward with the surgery was in his best interest, so we changed him into his hospital clothes and wheeled him down the long hallway with the anesthesiologist. Saying good bye was the hardest part. I just love that little boy so much. Dallan said the last words from his mouth were "Play hard Max Hall... go BYU!" The anesthesiologist called to tell me that his intubation was smooth, and that the surgery was going well. It took a little over an hour, but everything was "smooth sailing" as our doctor put it. He told us we could see him in about 10 minutes--- but we ended up waiting for almost an hour and a half! I could sit still for a few minutes at a time then would have to pace the hallway. We were so happy to finally see him. He looked so much better than we thought he would. His color already looked so much better! We spent the evening with him, then got him all tucked in and cozy before we left to get some sleep. He still isn't feeling well, but hopefully he'll be on the mend. Right now he still isn't breathing on his own. He is being ventilated through the trach. Hopefully, his little body will remember what to do! Dallan and I have 4 training classes- 2 hours each, and then we have to take care of Caleb on our own for 12 hours before we can bring him home. I am so thankful for sweet Caleb. I am so thankful for a loving Heavenly Father who stands by our side in our most tender moments. And I'm so thankful for all of the kind words you have all shared with me. Thank you for helping me to feel faith instead of fear! Over the next few days, I'll keep Caleb's blog updated with his progress! www.winkfromheaven.blogspot.com

Right before we took Caleb to the hospital


Waiting for surgery

We got lots of comments about our obvious preference for BYU



After surgery

Trach day

Today Caleb is going in for his tracheostomy. It really has been an agonizing decision, and I've had many tender moments in those quiet night time hours. Caleb has been sick for the past week. He hasn't been keeping his feedings down, and he has really been struggling to breathe. Those moments when he's turning blue,and looking panicked are the moments that really make me think that a trach is necessary. The doctor is aware that he's sick, but he still wants to go ahead with the surgery. He thinks it will just get more difficult the more we get into RSV season. We were not able to get the g tube scheduled because there weren't any surgeons available, so Caleb will be getting his trach and tubes in his ears today. I've been making arrangements for my other boys, cleaning my house, packing my bags, and working on Christmas cards- and now that I'm all ready, I'm afraid. I'm afraid that it's going to be overwhelming to take care of Caleb in a new way. I'm afraid I won't hear his voice again. I'm afraid that I won't be able to bathe him the same way. I'm afraid the Caleb will be hurting, and I'm afraid that my other boys are worried. I'm afraid of going back to the hospital because it has always been such a dramatic experience. I'm afraid that Caleb will be afraid.
Caleb's surgery is at 1:00 PM today. I'm praying that Heavenly Father will replace my fear with faith and that all will be well! I love you my sweet Caleb.

Family picture

I remember the night I had an ultra sound and found out that our baby Caleb had significant problems. We were faced with the unbearable possibility that our baby might not be born alive. Our first glimpses of him we were filled with worry and deeper heartache than I had ever felt before. The next day I remember telling my mom, "this isn't how I imagined my family picture." I didn't imagine hanging a family picture on my wall that had someone missing. I also hadn't pictured a child who's time may be limited and whose challenges would be severe. It wasn't that I didn't want a disabled child. I wanted Caleb more than anything in the world. I had the opportunity to voice how much we wanted Caleb in many of those early doctor appointments when they presented our options. I pleaded with Heavenly Father for the opportunity to take care of our baby no matter how big his challenges were. We wanted Caleb with all of our hearts, his circumstances just weren't what I had pictured. I remember that phrase This isn't how I imagined my family picture every time I put a new photograph in a frame, add a picture to a scrap book, or hang a portrait on my wall. My heart is filled with so much gratitude every time I look at my sweet little family inside those frames. It wasn't what I had pictured, it is so much sweeter than I could ever have imagined. I would never have pictured how proud I would feel of Caleb for his courage, faith and patience. I never pictured how full my heart would feel as I watch my other little boys lovingly watch over him. I never pictured how my sweet little boy, whose time may be limited and whose challenges are severe, would touch the deepest parts of our hearts and change our lives forever. Just yesterday Matthew told me, I just get such a big loving feeling inside whenever I'm around Caleb- and I just have to hug him.
I took our little family into the studio for some last minute pictures before Caleb goes in for surgery. The pictures aren't fancy, but nothing could be more beautiful to me. I would never have pictured the exquisit delight I would feel in hanging photographs of theses precious souls on my wall.